Anything & Everything Off-Topic (Some material may be offensive)
User avatar
By eg84dr
#217117 ahahaha good one lol
8 i say
what do u call a girl with one arm and one leg?????................














.













.


















eilen
pro nounced (i lean) haha


what do you call a dog with no legs


doesnt matter what you call it he still wont come






why did hellen kellers dog run away?






you would too if your name was duhhhhuhggggunnnm
User avatar
By evil-G-nius
#217145 OK...
your momma is so nasty, I called her up for phone sex and got an ear infection!

Your momma is so fat she wakes up in sections

and finally.....

where do Cheerio's come from?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
pregnant donuts! :lol:
User avatar
By Gorveatt
#217149
OleFolk wrote:Idk dude maybe like a 7 ^ So corny I didnt know why I should laugh.

There where Two Guys
The first guy walks into a bar
The second guys ducks


you should laugh cause that situation would never happen, cause women never mind their own business :thumb:

did you head about the two guys who stole the calendar? they each got six months
By Method
#217394 thats a good one Tim.

what did the mayonnaise say to the refrigerator?













close the door, I'm dressing.
User avatar
By Chance
#229673 6

How do you find a lost rabbit?




easy, just make a noise like a carrot.
Last edited by Chance on Fri Dec 24, 2010 6:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.
User avatar
By Chance
#229674 6.7

If you're an American when you go in the bathroom and an American when you come out what are you while you're in the bathroom?



European.
User avatar
By jred
#229796 7 :lol:

3 frogs were running a race,



one came toad...........
User avatar
By jred
#232671 There are these three guys in a desert dying of dehydration. Off in the horizon they see a house and finally manage to struggle to it. The first guy goes up to the door to ask for water. The door is opened by this really old, wart-covered, puss covered, scaly, toothless old woman.

"C-c-c-can I h-h-h-have some w-w-w-water for me and m-my friends?" he asks.

She replied, "I will... if you have sex with me."

The guy pukes all over the woman and runs back to his friends.

"You guys would not believe who answered the door. Some really gross old lady!" he tells them. "She said we could have water if I had sex with her."

"Why didn't you then?" asks he second guy.

"Because she was so ugly, I was sick and couldn't do it!"

"Oh, you are such a wuss. I'll go up to the door," the second guy says.

He goes up to the door and rings the bell. The old hag answers.

"W-w-w-w-w-w-waaaaaa......" He uses all of his will power to not hurl.

"Water? Yes, I have water," she says knowingly. "But you have to have sex with me."

"AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!"

He runs back to his friends and before he could say a word, the third guy goes to the door and rings the bell.

"What do you want for some water?"

"You have to have sex with me."

Knowing that if he doesn't do something, he and his friends will all die. So he follows the lady into her kitchen.

"Do me here," she told him.

He sees 3 ears of corn on the counter and gets an idea.

"Lay back and close your eyes. And keep them closed!"

The witch lays back and spreads her legs. The guy nearly pukes after seeing this. He picks up an ear of corn and skrews her with it. Finally she is finished. He throws the corn out the window.

"Oh, God. That was the best orgasm of my life. If you do that again I will give you a million dollars."

"Then lay back and close your eyes again."

This she does and he does her with the second ear of corn until she is satisfied. Then he throws it out the window. This time she doesn't even open her eyes.

"If you do that again, I will give you a Jeep so you can get out of the desert."

"Eyes closed," he says.

Then he does her with the last piece of corn. He brings her to multiple orgasms.

"Ohhhhhhhhh........ The water, money and Jeep are outside," she says as she squirms in ecstasy.

So he runs like hell outside and grabs the water and money and jumps into the Jeep. He wonders where his friends are and drives around to find them. He finds them by the window.

One of the guys says to him, "Hey, man. I hope you had fun. We just ate the three best pieces of buttered corn you could have imagined!"