Corny Jokes!!

Anything & Everything Off-Topic (Some material may be offensive)
 Reply
User avatar

Corny Jokes!!

By jred
- Mon Oct 04, 2010 7:51 pm #216786 ok here's the deal post your cornest joke and the person that post after you rate it out of ten"10" and the he post his cornest joke and so on and so on.....a bit of laughter never hurts. :thumb:
User avatar

By jred
- Mon Oct 04, 2010 7:52 pm #216787 here's mine:

So I'm in bed with this chick and we've been laying there for some time, so I go: "Hey, are we gonna fuck or what?" "You're being a bit presumptuous." She says. "Presumptuous? That's a big word for an 8 year old!"
User avatar

By evil-G-nius
- Mon Oct 04, 2010 8:35 pm #216796 Heres mine....


CHANCE!

:lol: :woot:
User avatar

By ghskid06
- Mon Oct 04, 2010 8:37 pm #216797 lol ehh ill give it a 4. But hey for a corny joke thats doing pretty good.

There are so many corny jokes out there...its hard to pick one..


How do you get holy water? by boiling the hell out of it.
User avatar

By jred
- Tue Oct 05, 2010 5:11 pm #216969 thats a 8 cuz its really corny

A young couple were married and they were having sex all the time during their honeymoon.

When the honeymoon was over they had to adjust their sex schedule to their work schedule. So every day the husband would get home at 5 o'clock, and every day they would go to bed at 5:15.

This went on for months, never missing a day until the wife came down with the flu and went to the doctor to get a flu shot.

The shot killed all the germs inside her except for three. These three germs were huddled together inside her body talking over their survival plans.

One germ said, "I am going to hide between two toes on her left foot. I don't think the antibiotics will find me there".

A second exclaimed, "I am going to hide behind her right ear. I don't think they'll find me there."

The last germ said, "I don't know about you guys, but when that 5:15 pulls out tonight, I'm gonna be on it!"
User avatar

By eg84dr
- Tue Oct 05, 2010 10:30 pm #217012 ahahah thats like a 8 or 9

heres mine
three women trapped on an island
one blonde
one brunete
and one red head
a magic genie apprears and asks then each to wish for one thing to help them on the island but it couldnt be anything to help get them off the island just to help them live
the brunete says id like some food so when im hungry i can eat
bam she has an infinite supply of food for her and the other two girls
now the red head says i already have food so how bout something to drink
bam she gets an infinite supply of drink for her and the other two girls

now the blonde thinks for a b it and she says
i already have food i already have drink sooo


how bout a car door so when it gets hot i can roll the window down
:lol:
User avatar

By Gorveatt
- Tue Oct 05, 2010 10:56 pm #217015 hahahah that's pretty good, i'd say an 8, cause i know there are better


Whats brown and sticky?



A Stick

By Method
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 12:14 am #217026 that's a 9 for sure.

what do you call a snowman in the desert?








a puddle.





what do you say to a monkey with a banana in each ear?







anything you want, he can't hear you.

what did the ocean say to the shore?




nothing, it just waved.


i have lots more, my wife works with kids and she tells me these jokes all the time.
User avatar

By Gorveatt
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 12:48 am #217031 haha i'd say an average of 7 for those ones

one day there were these two women were sitting quietly on a park bench minding their own business.....



*think about that for a moment*
User avatar

By OleFolk
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 2:04 am #217040 Idk dude maybe like a 7 ^ So corny I didnt know why I should laugh.

There where Two Guys
The first guy walks into a bar
The second guys ducks
User avatar

By jayEGR
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 4:01 am #217064 6^lol those were pretty good

ill try one out its sumthin

ok your moma is so fat she had to use diet soap .

any moma joke guys lol i know that was corny as fuck
:lol:
User avatar

By evil-G-nius
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 4:28 am #217070 Why do ducks have flat feet?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
from stamping out forrest fires



Why do elephants have flat feet?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
from stompin out flaming ducks! :woot: CORNY BITCHES! LOL
User avatar

By jred
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 11:50 am #217109 Thats a 8 :lol: very random


Why can't people with one arm go to Hawaii
-

-
-
cuz Hawaii is for tourist "two wrist" :lol:
User avatar

By ron_kimi
- Wed Oct 06, 2010 12:03 pm #217111 thats 8 for me hahaha

Heres mine how do you place a elephant inside a volkswagen beetle?

Answer : You open the door and push the elephant inside...

Ok i know thats corny...

Heres another one Tarzan called all the animals for a meeting in the jungle!
guess who of all the animals did not show up?







Answer the elephant coz he's still stuck inside the volkswagen! :D
 Reply
Return to Junk Yard