Civic EG

My wife is dealing with some hardcore post partum depression and anxiety. Its BAD. It really hit her hard 05/31 and its been a struggle since. I'm drained and wore out mentally, physically and emotionally... but its nothing compared to what she is dealing with. I'd rather me be kidnapped and tortured in a basement in Kentucky for years than to see her have to go through this.

Anyone ever have anyone go through this type of thing? Any suggestions for cooping or helping the situation.
(she's taking meds but I dont feel like explaining the med situation at the moment. In short, she hasn't been on the depression med long enough for it to 'be in her system' but it should be anyday now and the anxiety med... barely helping if anything.)

I know this isnt a medical forum or what not but most of us on here are human and this is something some end up going through. So, if you've had experiences like this or anyone you know, Share your story.

Do you know what may trigger this? or has it been going on for a while?

My experience, I had depression as an early teen in high school, family separation, bullys, stress of high school etc. During that time i've moved house 3 times, couch surfed for a while, repeated the 10th grade. I only had it for 2 years, counselling does help. After all, I did pull through the hard times.

10 years later i've never felt any better then this, working 2 jobs that I love, have genuine friends, i'm more confident and have no trouble talking to strangers, problem fixing is easy, less stressed etc

Just constantly remind your wife that you, family/friends will always be there to support her. I know it's tough and can rub off onto you. Meds do work overtime, but was told they can be addictive, but make sure she gets counselling, make sure she doesn't drink alcohol while on meds (they do reverse effects)

-You could also try, afternoon walks together (exercise releases endorphins which makes you feel better)

-Cook her a healthy meal, vegetables, good meats, fruit (contents in fast food these days makes you feel sluggish and after the sugar hit, it brings you down)

-Take her and some friends out, something fun that she will remember for a long time, like paintballing, laser skirmish, picnic?

All the best man

I am lucky...I can honestly say I have never been depressed. With that said, I know when I have a shitty day I do need something else to focus on, so like Kapow said try things that will take her mind off of whatever is bothering her. I know post pardum is a chemical thing, but anything you can do where she sort of needs to concentrate or is mentally stimulating. Just watch her, remind her you love her and that you are there for her. As far as your sanity...you can always vent here and if you ever have time to yourself do the same thing with respects to concentration and mental stimulation. A great stress reliever is the driving range...after concentrating on a bucket of 100 balls your stress is gone. Good luck home skillet....we got your back!

From wiki..

Postpartum depression usually begins in the first few months after childbirth. In Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition it is defined as depression with onset within 4 weeks after childbirth.[7] It usually begins around two weeks after childbirth.[8] It may last up to several months or even a year

She's 4.5 months post partum now. Hormones and Serotonin levels are much of the cause of this. Also the stress we are going through with life in general right now.


The medicine she is on will balance out her serotonin levels that create the depression. Its not necessarily "addictive" but you have to ween off it when you choose to go solo and think you'll be ok. The anxiety med is highly addictive but we are going to talk to her doc about trying another one that isnt. I've worked in Pharmacy for a little over 6 years so I'm pretty up on all the med status of all this.

All those are great suggestions. The walks are what I keep trying to get her to do. She's at a point where she feels like she 'cant' to anything and just needs to be in bed. When in reality they say you need to push through that and get up and do something. Its easy for us to say.... i'm sure its killer to do since she wont.

Tried to plan a LITTLE getaway to see her family that live up north in Arizona in the mountains. but she isn't really feeling up to it. I figured cooler mountain air, relaxing atmosphere out of the city, some light fishing/chilling, and walks would be great. but she wasnt down for it.


You're right about that as well.... I'm there for her 100%. I've lost focus on me and thats wearing on me. Was even told a few times recently that i look thrashed/terrible/tired. but just keep thinking... this isnt about me.

kapow wrote:All the best man

thank you.

evil-G-nius wrote:I am lucky...I can honestly say I have never been depressed. With that said, I know when I have a shitty day I do need something else to focus on, so like Kapow said try things that will take her mind off of whatever is bothering her. I know post pardum is a chemical thing, but anything you can do where she sort of needs to concentrate or is mentally stimulating. Just watch her, remind her you love her and that you are there for her. As far as your sanity...you can always vent here and if you ever have time to yourself do the same thing with respects to concentration and mental stimulation. A great stress reliever is the driving range...after concentrating on a bucket of 100 balls your stress is gone. Good luck home skillet....we got your back!

Thanks dude. Same here. I cant really relate to the depression. But I have had anxiety to the level she's having it. Only happened to me a few times.
I havent/cant to do anything really for me ya know? she needs me/support constantly. I havent been to the gym in weeks, Called into work all last week because I had to check her into a behavioral health facility for 6 days (shows how serious this all is) she's home now but even yesterday i was just going to run to the store for potatoes and she didnt want me to leave her.
But definitely.. I'm really just venting for sure here, so thanks all to here that are listening.

No real advice here, just wishing you and your families the best of luck!

If you're religious, god bless! (if not, no offense)

Thanks!^

I am Sorry that you are going through some very troubling times. It's also hard that you have little ones. Your Wife needs you the most right now and Please keep strong for them. If you are religious just ask for a little guidance and I hope that everything gets better soon. I will pray for you and your family. Thank You for sharing as sometimes just keeping things all to yourself is harder to deal with.

Thank you. Thats one thing I'm trying to work on... being more religious and praying.

my wifes, mom aunt and grandpa died of cancer within the same year, antidepression meds were used and it helped, what didnt help was she was getting dependent on them and using them for every day life, slowly lowering the dose and bringing her back to reality was hard but it was for the best, both her and i thought it was best.

You're not alone bro after my daughter was born about 5-6 months later she started going through the same thing, didn't go far enough to get on meds but man it was a challenge. Some things I tried go walking to the park, hang out with her friends, cook her something new or different or her favorite dish, make a collage with your family pics (mine loved this ) give her a massage, switch furniture around ( weird I know but it kinda gave the room a different vibe ) trip to the amusement park, hiking in the mountains, always reassured her that I love her and support her all the way, also went to church more.
last year was hectic think that's why I never worked out but didn't bother me it was hard at first because she never really wanted to express how she felt about her situation I tried so hard to put myself in her shoes but I think it's like a personal wall that sooner or later with help and support they get over.
wish you and your family the best
Be strong dude

Thank you all for the support/input and the reasurement that things will turn out alright!!

I'm sorry to hear this, Chance.
From all of the past stories on hear, it appears that everything will be all right, but you gotta keep your head up and push through this tiny obstacle and your wife will be back man
have you tried having her family visit you guys?
I have small anxiety panics from time to time since I moved to Illinois and nothing would make me feel better like seeing my parents and friends.

my mom had a spurt of deep depression...dad found a few things to help..gonna sound stupid but CHOCOLATE is your best friend. flowers and CONSTANT talking. everythin will be alright, i feel you on the kentucky-basement-torture though, im the same way when my fiance gets down.

I'm glad I saw this thread and know what you mean. My wife is going through post partum as well but it's more anxiety since she already has a history of anxiety for the last few years. It sucks because I can't really relate or give her any good advice. The best thing you can do for your wife is to be there for here whenever you can. I second the advice about family & friends. Being alone is probably the worst thing for her right now.
There's a lot of different medication too. What works for some didn't work at all for my wife. If what she is taking doesn't end up taking affect, don't hesitate to go back to the Dr. and see if there's a different option.